'Donations'

A common problem at Walnut Bluff is people leaving bags and boxes of unwanted 'donations' in the dead of night. Right now we are having an argument about which is worse: the three boxes of ancient Civil War books left by the back door in which gloried Confederate generals featured prominently, or the two ripped plastic bags left by the front door of cassette tape cases (yes, you read that right, they were empty).

It's sort of a moot point, as both went straight into the trash.

Pig's name

 Patrons have to call or email us to make an appointment to pick their requests up via curbside service. Here's a recent conversation I had with one family, when the adult called to make a pickup appointment.

Me: Looks like we have 3 books ready for you.

Patron: Can you tell me: Are those all chapter books, or are some of them for little kids?

Me: I'm sorry, they're all chapter books; it looks like the early readers are still on their way. But if you have a younger kid at home, if you can tell me a little bit about them and what they like, we could pull some suggestions for you.

Patron: Oh, that would be great! He's four and he's reading level 1 or 2 readers. He likes Paw Patrol, Peppa Pig, Blaze and the Monster Machines...

Little boy (in background): Boy books!

Patron: (to kid) Girl books are good, too. (to me) No 'girl books,'  but for some reason, Peppa is fine...

Little boy: Peppa isn't a girl's name!

Patron: It's not?

Little boy: No, Peppa is a pig's name!

Granite

 A patron described the color of their car as "granite" when making a curbside pickup appointment this week and it absolutely broke Chillest Coworker, who collapsed into horrified laughter. I don't know why this was the thing that finally got to him, but it was.

Curbside at Walnut Bluff

Colors patrons have told us their cars are:

-Bronze

-Champagne

-"A purplish blue, but it will look black." 

-"I say it is green but my husband says it is gray."

-"It's a really janky white Monte Cristo. You will know it when you see it."

Walnut Bluff residents' favorite activity: Calling us to make a curbside appointment and telling us they will come in Car A. Showing up for their appointment in Car B and being really mad that we don't telepathically know it's them and bring their stuff out.  Walnut Bluff residents' second favorite activity: Waiting in the parking lot without calling/texting to tell us they came in a different car, then shouting their information at us when we go out to bring out someone else's holds.

We have three signs on our front doors saying that our building is closed. Literally every day, I see multiple people come up, pause, read the signs, and THEN pull on the door handle to try to come in.

Reasons people park in the curbside pickup parking spots:

1. It's the shadiest spot in the parking lot

2. They are visiting the apartment complex across the street

3. They are cleaning their car/changing a flat tire/eating their lunch/making a phone call

4. They plan to get out and come inside the library

5. They are here for a curbside pickup

I definitely do NOT hit my head on the bike rack of a patron's car when I am closing their trunk. Nope, not even a little bit.

I find a 'curbside bingo' on the internet. The space that hits home the most is 'you and patron disagree on color of patron's car.'

Closure questions part 2

Things patrons want to know right now:

• I have a ton of zucchini from my garden and I thought the library staff might like them. Can I put them in the book drop for you?
• How late are you open today?...What do you MEAN I can't come into the building?
• But I've been holding on to these old magazines for you for MONTHS--are you SURE I can't just donate them? Don't worry, my house is very clean, I'm sure they are safe. They are great magazines, in perfect condition.
• Is there still storytime this Friday?
• Did you know that people were parking in the library parking lot while y'all were closed? I thought you should know that people were violating the law.
• I came by the library back in April to return my books, but the book return thingy was closed, so I just put my books on the top. Did you get them?
• Is the library going to never open again?

Curbside callousness

Like many public libraries, my library is not letting people into the building, but will let people come pick up their requested materials via curbside service. Our administration had the brilliant idea that we should get a service that allows patrons to text us when they are here for their pickup instead of calling. It's supposed to save us time because it forces the patron to go through a little back-and-forth to collect information before we even see their message. The phone number isn't on the website or anything, it's ONLY posted in the parking spots where patrons who are picking up their held materials are supposed to park for curbside service.

How the new text service is supposed to go:
Patron: Hi I'm here to get my books.
Chatbot: Welcome to [library system]'s curbside service! Text "book" to get started.
Patron: Book
Chatbot: What is your first and last name?
Patron: Ramona Quimby
Chatbot: What parking spot are you in?
Patron: Spot 1
At this point, on the staff side, we get a message saying:
Name: Ramona Quimby
Parking spot: Spot 1 

Them we trot cheerfully out to Ms Quimby, who is indeed actually parked in spot #1 and is even wearing a face mask and keeping her window rolled up, and has her trunk popped, and we drop her stuff in the trunk and close it and she drives away. Brilliant, right? Here's how the chatbot actually works. It turns out you can type in absolutely f-ing anything in response to the chatbot's questions, so lots of 'conversations' go like this:

Patron: why can't I come into the library to print?
Chatbot: Welcome to [library system]'s curbside service! Text "book" to get started.
Patron: i don't want a book, I want to get n the computer!
Chatbot: What is your first and last name?
Patron: cruella deville
Chatbot: What parking spot are you in?
Patron: why does tha mattter??? i just want to come in the library!
Staff member (who can only see: "Name: Cruella Deville. Parking spot:
why does tha mattter??? i just want to come in the library!"): Hi Ms. Deville. I'm sorry, but no one can come into the library right now. Did you need to pick up your requests?
Patron: no I need to get on a f-ing computer!!!!!!!!
Staff member: I'm sorry, but you can't do that right now. If you'd like to call us at [redacted], we might be able to help you find somewhere else than can help you with what you need.
Staff member: *bangs head on desk in frustration*

Open for your phone calls

This is a delayed post. We've all been sent home, but there was about a week where the library was closed to the public but staff were coming to work. We mostly worked on collection projects, cleaning, training, etc., but we were answering phones during open hours. Here's what people wanted to know:

Are you open? When are you going to be open again?

Is tax help still happening this week? What about next week?

I'm not going to come pick up my holds. Can you guys hold on to them a little bit longer or will I lose my place in line? 

I've been self-isolating at home and I cleaned out my house. I have a lot of books to donate. Can I bring them in? What if I just put them in the book return slot?

If I come sit by the front door and use your wifi, will you call the police?

Can I email you something to print, and you print it, and then I come to the door and you just hand it to me really quick?