Today is apparently Annoying Regular Day at the library. We have Retired Librarian, Inarticulate Catalog Guy, Mr. Take-My-Card, Running Kid, Hooligan Kids, the whole lot. On the bright side, we also have an old man who I have never seen before who could become a great regular. He hasn't asked for any help but I observed him on the computer on a massively ancient news site, reading story after story about whales. He's been there for at least an hour.
In related news, the White Whale exists.
Edit 2/14: Per excellent reader suggestion, we are naming the whale guy Captain Ahab.