Overheard by the staff elevator...

... One security guard saying to another, "I think the incident report is just called 'Stinky'."


It's been quite the week at the library so far. Most, but not all, of the limited selection of tax forms the IRS has deigned to send us this year have come in, so every staff member has to have the conversation below roughly three times a day:
"Do you have tax forms?"
"Do you know which ones you need?"
"You know, the regular ones."
"Well, we have the federal 1040 forms, the state forms, and the city forms. We will also be getting a book of federal forms that you can photocopy."
"Okay, so are those the ones I need?"
"I'm sorry, sir, but I can't tell you which forms you need. I am not a tax professional."


It's amazing how much people want you to tell them what to do. Today a man yelled at one of my nicest coworkers (who was already having a bad day) because she told him she couldn't tell him which brand of tires to buy.


Another patron stands way inside my personal space, asking me to look up pictures of famous religious buildings. When I tell him that I don't have time to look up the whole list but that I'd be happy to help him get logged on to a computer and teach him to do it himself, he said "Oh no, I don't do computers."


Where are your tax forms?


Three different people come up to tell me that they want to get on a computer. You can actually just get on one, you don't have to tell me anything.


Sir, can you please move your giant backpack away from the magazine rack? I think people might like to be able to see the magazines.


"If I want to print this file, do I just click 'open'? I need to copy some pages from the computer."


Three people all want change for the printer at the same time.


My coworker who had to deal with the rude tire guy sighs and says "My brain is officially mush." Both of us worked the closing shift yesterday and maybe didn't get as much sleep as would be ideal. It's hard to always provide service that is both friendly and effective. Sometimes I only have enough energy for one.